Thank you to Jason McElroy for perfectly describing the shit-wagons seen at the Horse's smokeout every year.
"Backstreet chopper: A soulless assembed bike from parts ordered from small cottage-industry specialty craftsmen and large commercial distributors alike. Assembed with the help of opinions solicited from various lifestyle forums and photographs from magazines touting what is currently Kool or Kustom. They carry no gear because there's nowhere to put it or it rarely leaves the ZIP code. Yearly attemped trips to chopper mecca, a chance for others to recognize, frequently end in the back of late model luxury pickup trucks with cool band stickers on the back window and motel tickets in the glove box. The right and left hand side (and the top side and the bottom side) have trinkets affixed including beer tap handles, billiards, dice, etc, and largely include the requisite custom stripes, or playing cards, or devil girls, or whiskey bottles, or repop 50s automobile light fixtures, or clear coated spray-can patina. It stays in the truck or in front of the hotel room so the owner will know it's their bike and not their Bro's.The kind of bike you throw a full set of arm sleeve tattoos on in the space of a year so everyone knows its a walking typecast riding it."
and then there's the people who bring this kinda garbage around.